Healthy Relationships

How to Express your Feelings and Needs in a Non-Threatening Way

We live in an era when many people use emojis and ALL CAPS to express their feelings. It can feel like no one communicates face to face anymore at times! While this varies from person to person, and from location to location, there are still some constants. For example, people still want to express their feelings and needs. But the settings can be varied. It could be while they're lying in bed next to the person, it could be a text message, or it could be over the phone. I hear this question quite often from my clients "How can I communicate my feelings in a non-threatening way?" The first thing to note is that every individual is different. One person will respond differently than another because they were socialized differently as a child, and throughout their life they've been influenced by different people and experiences. But there are some general themes that we can discuss as a starting point. [Book an appointment to discuss your individual habits and behaviours with Nicklas to help you communicate more effectively What makes your expression style appear threatening? There are obvious examples, of course. When you announce that you’ll commit bodily harm if you don’t get your way, well, the threat is clear. However, on purpose or not we can often change the dynamics of a conversation in far more subtle ways: Voice-related issues: How loud we speak is major. Also, keep in mind the balance of how much we speak and how much we listen, and whether or not we interrupt. Posture, gestures, etc: Body language can shift perception. Standing while everyone is sitting is a common example of body language that can appear threatening. In addition, [...]

By |2020-03-03T20:21:33+00:00October 23rd, 2017|Couples Counselling, Healthy Relationships|0 Comments